BlogDay 2007

Today has been dedicated as BlogDay 2007 when bloggers from all around the world have the opportunity to get to know each other and recommend blogs to their blog visitors. To participate, you can read more about it here or click on the BlogDay button in the Sidebar of my blog.

My five recommendations are the following:

• Sarah Robbins at Uber Noggin...Big Brains...Big Thoughts: Sarah is my younger daughter and dedicates this blog to communications, media, Web 2.0, Second Life, and education. I don't always understand the things she writes about, but that is part of the challenge. I enjoy keeping up with what is new and diving in with both feet is a good way to do it. I've found that I don't have to understand everything I read to still have some of it soak in and pretty soon, I realize I know more than I thought.
• Cupcake Bake Shop by Chockylit: I found this site when I was searching for unusual cupcake recipes for Nurse Lara's wedding reception. Have you ever heard of Cantaloupe and Honeydew cupcakes? The Banana Boston Cream Pie Cupcakes are awesome. Something different in a vanilla and chocolate world.
• Knitting Help: I have been knitting for most of my life, but I still have times when I need someone to demonstrate a technique for me. This is the place to find the videos for techniques ranging from beginner to advanced. I utilize this site all the time.
• Jayski: Better than NASCAR's site for finding out what is really happening in the world of racing.
• Ree is the Pioneer Woman: This is life on a cattle ranch as told by the city-girl turned ranch wife and mother. Humorous stories, beautiful pictures, a few great recipes. I love this site and visit it every day.

So, there are my choices. A variety of blogging experiences for your perusal. Join in and recommend five of your own. I'm waiting.

WHY ME?

You know, there are days when you just don't want to get out of bed and face the day and this was going to be one of those for me. I've been having a couple of lousy eating days, been worried about a relative, had a mild tiff with the Hubby, generally feeling low and wondering as I got out of bed...why me? Why on top of all the other worries that I have to face in just living life, do I have to constantly worry about what I am eating? If I'm not losing, I am gaining...where is that "holding steady" that "normal" people get to experience? Darn.

But I got out of bed and I did my "just put one foot in front of the other" self-talk that led me to get dressed, fix Hubby breakfast and see him off to work, and put a load of clothes in the washer. And as I was doing those mundane things, I realized that the problems I was dealing with were so small and manageable in comparison to the REAL problems that other people are facing, that I could hardly count them as problems at all.

When I was in nurse's training we were required to experience a bed bath, sit on a bed pan, and act as a patient so we would have a greater understanding of what it was like to be on the receiving end of the care we were to deal out. The school of nursing realized that we were 50 young things who most likely had not experienced too much adversity in our lives and it was their attempt at making us compassionate.

Sometimes, as I grew older, I looked back at some of the things I had thought I understood as a young adult and realized that it was the loss of loved ones that had made me more fully cherish the ones who were left to me. It was experiencing pain that made me more compassionate about the pain of others. It was knowing what sorrow was that made me recognize joy. And it was the tough times in life that had made me realize that I could be strong. I understand that a little adversity can make you a better person.

So, when I ask the "Why me?" question about my weight problem, it is because I am so blessed and have so few worries. My biggest burden is dealing with having too much in a world where so many have so little.

I think it's time for an attitude adjustment.

FEEDING FRENZY

Hubby took Friday afternoon off from work and we decided we'd do some errands and hit a few yard sales, but first, he wanted to have lunch at a neighborhood pizza place that features a buffet lunch Monday through Friday. It's a big hit with the working crowd and the parking lot was pretty full when we arrived. I was hoping that I could use that as an excuse to go somewhere else...it is not a very "healthy" place to lunch, but I hate always saying no to the idea of eating there. He seemed pretty set on going in so I "went along to get along". Once inside, we were faced with a line of people waiting to pay and a dining room full of men in for a quick lunch. By the time we got up to the buffet area, I could see that the salad bar consisted of lettuce and a couple of full-fat dressings. There was spaghetti and sauce, some garlic bread-heavy on butter and topped with mozzarella, and 1 or 2 slices of pizza. This was not looking good.

I gamely grabbed a bowl of lettuce with a little dressing, a piece of garlic bread, and a diet drink. We sat down and I swear you could cut the tension in the room with a knife as all these guys eyed the buffet waiting for more pizza to come out. Once it did, there was a mad rush for the line and the plates were piled high and the next round of waiting began. Sitting here writing this, I'm wondering why I was hungry at all after witnessing this "lions waiting for the zebras at the watering hole" scene, but the feeling was so contagious, that before I knew it, I had scarfed down the salad, the bread, and two more pieces that Hubby brought back to the table, two pieces of pizza...and then it hit me...what on earth is your problem? I had been caught up in this feeding frenzy and had eaten way more than I needed or wanted...I had gulped it down like I was afraid someone was going to take it from me if I didn't...and my choices were lousy at best.

I left feeling stuffed...and also amazed that I had allowed myself to be swept up in the attitude that had prevailed in the restaurant. I can laugh about it now and be aware of the out-of-control behavior that the buffet environment can induce. I guess there is more animal instinct left in us than we'd like to admit and the competitive atmosphere that the "shortage" of food brought on left me behaving in a manner that is unusual for me...thank goodness.

One more lesson learned.

GOING INTO THE WEEKEND

First...thanks to anyone who responded to my buffet poll in my last poll. It gave me a little snapshot of what a variety of people would like to see as well as a couple of good recipes.

Hubby is doing a half-day of work today. He's coming down to the time of year when he has to use up his vacation time or lose it...and we can't be doing that! I'm happy for him...he should have taken the whole day as the heat here is still awful...high 90's for a few more days.

Before I retired, I really looked forward to weekends because they were a respite from my normal routine and a time for being home and doing MY thing. Now, I love the daily routine that is mine...the house that is empty except for the dog and me...the schedule that is mine to determine. When Hubby is home, I let him set the schedule and he is a go...go...go person who wants to be doing something every minute. Ladies and Gentlemen...opposites do attract.

Since the weather will be so extreme, we may catch a movie...has Nanny Diaries started yet? I read the book and loved it...of course, if I drag Hubby to see that, I'll have to reciprocate by going to see something he likes and I am just being SWEET enough to accompany him to go see it as I eat salty movie popcorn one kernel at a time to make it last longer and skip lunch to make up for eating it and try not to fall asleep because I snore and dream of what knitting project I will start next or what I can get everyone for Christmas that will be nice and appreciated but not put us into hock and if we have any chance of having the county assessor really really consider the amount of taxes we are to pay on the house next year because fighting with the government is really so tiring and you never win anyway and I wonder if there is a Busch race this week and I'll have to remember that the Cup race is Saturday night this week since they are at Bristol and I LOVE short track racing because there is always something happening and I hope Mikey gets in and I wonder if qualifying will be this afternoon and if it is whether I can get home in time to see part of it and whether or not Hubby will want to go out for supper or if he will want pizza and if he does, I'll have to limit myself because I'm already eating this salty popcorn.

So...have a great weekend...one of those last of summer-it's-almost-Labor-Day-Weekend kind of weekends. And drink plenty of water!!!

POLL

Nurse Lara and I are planning food for her wedding reception in March and I'm kinda wondering what my readers think are good options for a buffet. I know what I like to find in such instances...lots of variety...lots of smaller nibbles that I can take a little taste of and then go on to the next thing. I like to have a choice of vegetarian, ethnic, and comfort foods. I want to have the option of grabbing something really sinful or something healthy. I want choices that guys will go for and also the lighter, more feminine foods. That's what I find appealing about buffets.

Of course, as the person responsible for preparing the foods...I love catering family events...I need things that can be prepared in advance and require little or no fuss at the time they are served...that's where casseroles are really handy!

So...my creative readers...my gadfly friends...I ask you...have you seen something at a party or reception recently that you really enjoyed? Or is there something that you wish you had found on a buffet or party table? Leave me a note...I'd love to hear your ideas.

It was nearly 90 degrees here in Indianapolis yesterday...humid...sultry...and what did I prepare for dinner? Chili!!! Don't you just love air-conditioning? It can almost make you forget how hot it is outside. (Of course, I am also knitting wool socks...so...I'm going to make it Fall whether it wants to be or not!) And it was such a treat after all the "lighter"...delicious as they are...foods we've been having. It is times like this that I am so grateful for being on Flex...I can have food that is sometimes scorned and left out of "diet" plans.

I have altered my chili recipe to make sure it is as lean as possible and I use far less pasta in it than I used to...it's a midwest thing!...but it is still MY chili and delicious. I love soups all year long and I think it's kinda sad that we shelve them for the summer. Soup is probably my number one choice for lunch or to begin dinner. Hubby eats his lunch at work at 11 in the morning, so he comes home a little after 3 wanting something to eat. I usually have a snack of some crackers and cheese and tomato juice or fruit and a little cottage cheese for him...but I also like offering him a bowl of homemade soup part of the time. It seems that also takes the edge off our appetites for dinner and we are happier with less food than we would normally be.

Well, back to the knitting. Hope to hear your buffet ideas!

1. Skinny Guy said,

   August 23, 2007 at 6:26 am · Edit

   I find most special-occasion buffets consist of pretty standard fare, so I’m always pleased when I encounter things that I don’t normally expect. But then I’ve always been an experimenter. The flip side is that you’re trying to accommodate a lot of different tastes and not leave some of your guests with nothing to eat. Of course, being the big help that I am, I’m coming up blank trying to think of specific examples.

   Chili! It’s been cool and damp in South Jersey since the weekend, so a nice big bowl of chili would have hit the spot! It won’t be long before I make a batch now that fall is just around the corner, although I can’t say that I’ve ever made it with pasta. You’re right, it must be a midwest thing.

2. kathycalculates said,

   August 23, 2007 at 6:42 am · Edit

   I heard the New York television commentators talking about the very cool weather yesterday.
   Thanks for your input…I like “different” things interspersed with the expected…love those little surprises. I’m thinking little individual bread puddings or even macaroni and cheese…just enough for a few bites.

FITTING?

I've seen a lot of talk about FitDay around the weight loss blogs in the last couple of weeks, and since it is totally free...my favorite way to experiment...I decided to check it out.

I have been in the habit of checking calories as well as points every once in a while, since I am only human and fudge those points as much as possible. It keeps me honest with myself. This site allowed me to check the calorie content of my meals for the day and then go a step further to check the percentage of fat, protein, and carbohydrates that made up my food for the day.

I was pleased with the caloric total and kinda taken aback at the percentage of the calories that were devoted to fat since I consider my fat intake pretty low...but after looking at the big picture a little longer, I relaxed a little. I realized that a lot of the foods I eat are very low in calories...lettuce, tomatoes, green peppers...and that they only have 4 calories per gram, so it only made sense that the more caloric fat content, at 9 calories per gram, would make up a higher percentage of the calories. Even then, it was a good reminder of why I choose chicken over ground beef, low-fat dairy products, and limit my peanut butter.

I was also a little surprised when I saw that the percentage of carbs I was eating was twice that of the protein. I take in most of my carbs in complex form...whole grain breads, fruits, and vegetables...and they make up a great deal of my food plan. I think I am getting just the right amount of protein for me.

I was happy to have this analysis available so I could see where there might be room for improvement and will probably do a spot check about once a month.

I think the shorter days have kicked my body into fall mode even though the weather here still hangs out around the 90's. I've been thinking soups and stews and my high-fiber muffins. Gonna drag out some of those recipes and stock up on the ingredients necessary to make them when the spirit hits me. I've also been checking out the apples over the melons...gonna make an orchard run soon for the early apples...love the smell of that old barn! Fall is definitely my favorite time of year...the colors, smells, and the brisk mornings followed by warm afternoons...I could wax poetic if I had the ability!

SELFISH?

Skinny Guy commented on my last blog post that he sometimes felt "selfish" in his approach to his weight loss and blog in that he did them both primarily for himself and if anyone else could gain from his success or failure, then that was up to them. I have to agree with his sentiments.

I began my blog in order to journal my experiences with weight loss. I found it helpful to jot down my thoughts or concerns and many times, as I was writing the entry, I would gain some clarity concerning something that had bothered me all day. I would read back what I had written and wonder, "Now where did that come from?

I have always sought to be honest without stepping out of my comfort zone into areas that I thought might be too personal. I think all bloggers have to make the decision as to where their boundaries will lie.

At the same time, I realized that by putting my thoughts into blog form and hitting "enter", that there was a chance that someone else would see it. In fact, I hoped to join a community of people who were sharing the same journey and eventually have a network of friends who I could learn from, laugh with, and cheer on.

I have found those people and I value their friendships very much. But...I still do the entries for me...I am the only one who can win this battle I'm fighting. I am the only one who makes the decisions as to what I will be eating and the only one who will "win or lose" as a result. And for that reason, I think we all have to be a little selfish about our commitment to weight loss.

A couple of weeks ago, I found myself trying to adjust my plan to fit better with my husband's eating requirements, and it sent me into a tail-spin. I finally figured out that I was going to have to be "selfish" and concentrate on my efforts and then try to help him. I think we're both better off because I made that decision.

I've found myself tagging along with the gang and going to restaurants that weren't in line with my needs, but I didn't want to be "selfish" and suggest something that would be better for me. I've found myself putting the more expensive food item back on the shelf and choosing something that was less expensive, but not as healthy for me, because I didn't want to be "selfish" and demand the best.

Sometimes, being a little "selfish" is what we need the most. I've had a chance to meet a lot of people who are fighting the same battle I am, and one of the things we have in common is that we are "nice" and "people-pleasers". Maybe that's part of the reason we find ourselves eating away hurt feelings. We don't want to call attention to our own needs even when those needs are as important as our health and well-being.

Maybe it is time we all became a little more "selfish" with our time and our needs. Maybe we'd all be a little better off if we put ourselves first once in a while.

Another lesson learned from the Skinny Guy...thanks.

WE DON'T HAVE TO BE PERFECT

I read Christine's blog today and it got me thinking about the way we portray ourselves and our every day successes and failures with our food plans...and, I have to agree that she is right about the fact that a lot of us probably paint a rosier picture in our blogs about how we may be feeling than is actually the case. I'm prone to seek the positive and try to emphasize that in my blog while, at the same time, letting it be known that I have my rough days. I'm not perfect so my eating plan is not perfect...and that's alright. I know I will not overcome my problem with overweight as much as I hope to learn to manage it better than I used to.

Christine said she was afraid that she was letting her fellow bloggers down by not being perfect. That's a lot of responsibility to carry around...and I don't think any of us expect perfection from anyone. If this was easy, we wouldn't need our blogs or each other. We'd be spending our time and efforts on loftier pursuits. I don't know you personally, Christine...but from what I do know of you from your blog, you have a smile that would light up the northern hemisphere, you have a heart of gold, you have a great blog, you have a great profession, a handsome husband...and you have made a giant step toward living a long, healthy, happy life...and you don't have to be perfect at this eating thing.

We don't have to "confess" our eating "sins" to each other...we've all been caught with our spoons in the peanut butter...or Nutella, Veronika. That's why we are so understanding and compassionate with each other...we understand when Jonathan says a cookie called out his name...we understand when R.E. says her weight keeps her from doing things she wants to do and causes her to fear new situations. We all know what it feels like to wonder why we are different than those people who don't seem to notice food.

So, if we paint a rosy picture, maybe we're whistling in the dark. We're keeping the shades drawn so no one will notice we haven't dusted lately. That's ok. We all understand the ups and downs...we've all been there. Love you, Christine...and we're all cheering for you.

1. Skinny Guy said,

   August 18, 2007 at 10:18 am · Edit

   “Persistence, not Perfection” is one of the quotes that keeps popping up in my WW meetings. I didn’t start my blog until I hit maintenance, but I still try to post about any bumps in the road when they happen. That way I can go back and hopefully learn from my mistakes and if anyone else can learn from them, all the better.

   Ultimately, though, I’ll admit that my weight loss and my blog are both things that I’ve done for myself, not for anyone else. I invite everyone to read about both my successes and failures, and it’s up to the readers to determine what, if anything, they get out of it, but at the end of the day I am really only responsible for what I get out of it.

   I guess that’s part of why I get a funny feeling when folks tell me I’ve been an inspiration to them, because in my mind, I’ve been doing this for me, and I’ve sometimes been very selfish about it. Not in how I treat people, but in the choices I’ve made along the way. It’s almost like getting an award for being selfish, and that makes me feel uncomfortable.

   Sorry for turning this comment into a blog post of my own, but I’ve been reading it for a few days now and finally was able to figure out why I had to keep reading it.

IT MUST BE THE SEASON

To every thing there is a season. This is the time of year when my eating plan always takes a "hit". It seems I am happily going along eating all those great salads and grilled foods...enjoying the fresh produce and the fresh brewed iced tea...when suddenly, I wake up one day and say, "Enough!" and then start craving every food item I have not eaten for the past year. It must be the "hunter-gatherer" genes in me that says, "You'd better eat now and fatten up or you'll starve!!!"

This too shall pass, but the battle must be fought.

The grandkids started school yesterday. Audrey called to inform me that she was all dressed in a pink t-shirt and capris...her words...and her backpack was ready. I hope she's still that enthusiastic in a month or so.

And the triplets went to kindergarten for the first time. They also had back-packs and their "power pencils" purchased by their Mama to make them extra smart. We wanted so badly to go and hide down the street so we could watch them exit the school bus for the first time, but I knew I would be crying so hard I wouldn't be able to see them anyway.

I've been happily knitting a fall sweater for Audrey and am 95% done, so you'll excuse the brevity of the post today. Yarn's awaitin'!

MONDAY...MONDAY

Go ahead...hum it all day...remember the Mamas and the Papas...I will!

Speaking of mamas and papas...I was honored this morning by a call from my younger daughter, Sarah, who called while on her way to work to tell me she "appreciates" me. Isn't that a lovely way to start the day...or week...or the rest of your life? I am one of the fortunate ones who is surrounded by love and constant reminders of it. I am blessed.

I am constantly reminded that all those little vexations that can annoy us and send us to the refrigerator for fixing are just that...gnats that need swatting. If we can sludge on through some of the annoyances, there is so much to be grateful for and so much to smile about.

Go tell someone you appreciate them...it is so nice to be on the receiving end...and it's not so bad being on the giving end either.

BE CAREFUL WHAT YOU ASK FOR

I ran into two women yesterday...mother and daughter... who I had not seen for a couple of years. They have both been overweight for most of their lives. The mother had undergone some sort of bariatric surgery about 30 years ago when it first became popular. She lost a great deal of weight and over the ensuing years had gone on to regain most, if not all, of it back.

I had heard through mutual friends that they had both undergone bariatric surgery about a year or so ago. When I saw them, I was shocked. They had obviously done something to lose a great deal of weight. I'm sure they are both quite happy about that. But the change in their appearance went far beyond that.

The mother's face was deeply lined and wrinkled. She appeared to have aged 20 years. Both she and her daughter looked pale and their hair looked thin and brittle. And their once glowing skin was now dry and their arms and legs had a number of scabs and sores. Their eyes looked dull.

They looked thinner, but they did not look healthy or happy. They looked like they had recently left a concentration camp.

I know the ads for the bariatric surgery groups show you happy and healthy people, but even when I was considering it for myself, I never believed that the surgery would be without negative consequences for my health. I had seen too many of the people who had undergone the surgery...I knew their skin was saggy and they didn't look particularly "glowing".

I know it may be the answer for some, but after seeing the result of these women's surgical intervention, I am more happy than ever that I found another answer.

VISIT ME

My techy daughter, Sarah, tagged me for a meme yesterday, and I’ve posted it on my “Everything Else” blogsite. If you’d like to know 8 random things about me, you can come visit me there today. I’ll be sitting on the deck with a big glass of iced tea…bring your knitting and we’ll have a chat.

NSV

Sometimes I secretly bemoan the lack of progress I'm making...you know I refuse to weigh except every three months at the doctor's office...so I have to get my affirmations from other sources.

There is the general image I see in the mirror which seems slimmer. There's the chair at the dentist's office that I used to have to finangle my butt into before I could bring down the arm, but now, I can fit into without a problem. Same for the seat at the movies last time we went.

There's the fact that I bought tops a size smaller a couple of weeks ago because the size I had been wearing were just too baggy.

But there are still those stretchy knit pants that I was wearing when I began this battle over 70 pounds ago. They were snug then...one of the things that led me to do something about the weight in the first place. But there they are...still hanging in the closet...still being worn in their own rotation...and a constant reminder that maybe I haven't come as far as I would have liked. After all...my fat pants still fit!

So, I brought them out, put them on, and I'm telling myself that...see...they still fit...as I'm pulling them up to the bottom edge of my bra and then folding them over about six inches at the waistband so the crotch doesn't drag so low.

But they still fit!!!

YOU'RE NOT THE BOSS OF ME

It's funny when kids say that to each other, but it can also be an interesting dynamic among adults...especially married ones...who love and respect each other...and have the spouse's welfare at heart.

I got to thinking about the eating frenzy I found myself in yesterday afternoon when I woke up at 2 in the morning...my best time to think...and I think it was a symptom of some fear, anxiety, anger, frustration, and worry I've been feeling about Hubby's diabetes. For all the rosy picture of improvement in his blood sugars and eating habits I've been painting here...all true, by the way...there is also the story that I don't tell. It's kinda like the once a year letters you get from family and friends that portray Johnny as the captain of the football team but don't mention that he has a hard time passing Geometry.

Hubby and I were married 38 years ago come September and the secret to our long relationship has been the fact that we love each other and try to respect each other's boundaries. It can be a complex dance when one partner is a rather stubborn guy who wants to deal with his health in his own way and the other partner is a nurse who just knows if she explains just one more time how this diabetes should be handled that the lovable lunk will finally see she is and always has been right and if he would only do things her way he will live to be 101 and everything will be perfect. And those guys on TV thought learning to dance the Tango without stepping on each other's toes was hard.

For all the improvement he has shown, I look at him reaching for the jelly at the restaurant to add to his dry English muffin and there is a part of me that wants to slap his hand and scream...why don't you GET this???

For every smile of encouragement that I give him there is that little resentment that I am altering what I normally eat to set a good example for him and what does he do...he eats something at work that I have not planned for him . How dare he?

When you are the spouse and you are investing a chunk of yourself in this process, then it is easy to be frustrated and take it personally when your efforts aren't "appreciated 100%"...read...he doesn't follow my advice to the letter!

Yes...this is all tongue-in-cheek and I know on one level that I can't expect him to be perfect...none of us are. But I still seek that control of the situation that escapes me because I worry about him. And that can make you want to eat.

My parents were married 54 years when Dad suddenly started forgetting how to get home from church on Sunday morning and I watched Mom become what appeared to be "angry" with him. I was too young and inexperienced at the time to understand that what she was expressing was fear and the knowledge that her world was going to change in ways she could not control. She immediately began trying to control what he ate and tried her best to keep him from his cigarettes that he had been smoking since he was a kid. We all thought she was being "mean" and couldn't understand why she wasn't giving the poor fella a "break"...after all...he had lived a good long life and if he wanted to smoke once in awhile, what would it hurt? Well, to her, it was her last chance to gain some control over a situation that was so darned scary that it probably took her breath when she considered it. I understand now...I wish I had then.

Trying to think through the "why" I want to eat at times has been a learning experience for me. Sometimes I gain solutions or insights that I never would have found if I had just gone on mindlessly eating to protect myself from just this kind of feelings. It seems to me that it may be more "uncomfortable" in the short run to face fear or anxiety or lack of control, but if I am to find peace with any of those emotions, then I have to face them and deal with them. Food can't help me do that.

WELL, YOU COULD HAVE KNOCKED ME OVER...

Sometimes I'm just taken by surprise by those old "feed me...feed me" feelings that I think are, if not behind me, at least dormant.

I posted earlier today about how well I was doing with exchanging some of my carbs for lean proteins. I was comfortable with it and bragging to Hubby that I was really feeling good since I wasn't retaining fluids today.

We had lunch at our favorite Mexican restaurant where I passed up the chips...in fact, we told them we didn't want any today...and ordered a very nice shrimp salad which I had with salsa over it. I was so friggin' proud of myself and thinking I was really helping Hubby by setting a good example and joining him in making good choices.

So, we come home...Hubby goes off to put in some overtime at work for the evening...and I am suddenly overcome with a desire to just eat everything in sight. I drank a big glass of tea thinking maybe I was just thirsty...a common problem for me. Then I ate some sugar-free jello with a little Cool-Whip Lite. Then I had some carrots. Then I ate some 100 calorie popcorn. And I was still wanting to grab and eat.

What gives?

I've had this same response before when I've tried to cut the carbs back. There's probably a nutritional reason for it...I don't know.

There's the emotional element of trying to be "good" so I can set a good example for Hubby. It puts pressure on me that I don't usually feel.

There's the change in routine with Hubby being gone on Sunday afternoon.

It reminds me of when I was a kid and I would be skating away at the roller rink thinking I was more than cool when I would suddenly find myself on my butt. You always have to be on alert when you tend to eat for reasons that don't involve hunger. You never know when there will be a slippery slope waiting for you. All the more reason to understand that you are not the only one this happens to, laugh it off, try to learn something from it, and jump back into the frey. Good Grief!!!

CARB HUNTING

I've been on a quest recently to help Hubby straighten out his approach to eating as an insulin-dependent Type II. He tends to be a volume-eater, partially due to his tendency to eat quickly. And it is really difficult to change that habit after so many years...I'm not sure he really wants to. Because of that tendency, I've tried to steer him away from carbs that need to be eaten in very small amounts and educate him about the fruits and vegetables that fit into his eating style a little better.

Hubby tends to look at all fruits as being equal...berries, dried pineapple, apples, raisins...they're all fruits to him. His blood sugar knows the difference. We're making progress and his blood sugars are very good now...with half the insulin he was taking just two weeks ago. You can teach an old dog new tricks.

All the attention we've been paying to carbs in his diet has made me more aware of the balance of carbs to protein in my own. One of the wonderful things about flex is that I can divide the points into whatever food groups I want...and I will always choose a carb over a protein...always. I still lose weight and I still stay on-point, but history has proven that, for me, the fewer carbs I take in, the less water weight I retain and the faster the pounds come off...something I choose to ignore in my desire to eat those carbs.

But, to set a good example for the Hubby, I have been eating more lean proteins, zero-point vegetables, moderate amounts of fruits, and far fewer breads. And...I've decided not to replace the empty container of sugar-free ice cream!

So, we'll see if this approach helps me or Hubby more. It certainly can't hurt either one of us.

GOTTA LISTEN TO THE SKINNY GUY

I was reading Skinny Guy's blog this morning and he was reflecting on whether or not he had given up any foods that really mattered to him in order to lose weight. He ended his post with this:


"Now, just like before, I eat whatever I want. What matters now is that what I want is a little different than it was before."

He has been very successful at losing a chunk of weight and keeping it off...a shout out to you, Skinny Guy and all the GoaD...Guys on a Diet! And what he said about the change that took place in what foods "mattered" to him now really struck a chord with me.
It seems that what happened to him and a lot of others who have been successful with losing weight and keeping it off was that his health and feeling better started to matter more than the foods that may have "mattered" so much in the past. When you can put your own welfare ahead of your desire to eat a doughnut or two, you have accomplished a very important step along the path to better health.
Sometimes it is so hard to remember what the purpose of this whole exercise in better eating is all about...especially when you're seated in front of some of your old favorites. And I've found myself in the position of playing "how can I cheat the points" instead of "what's the healthiest choice".
Like Skinny Guy, I have conquered a host of old food demons...I have given up the butter for good...I don't even want it any more. The heavy breakfasts don't appeal to me. The meat-laden greasy pizzas don't call my name. The greasy hamburgers have given way to grilled fish or chicken.
I know there are still demons to do battle with, but I'm so grateful that I'm doing battle with fewer of them as I progress.

IT COULD BE ME

Have you watched any of those shows where they tell the story of the super obese...you know...the guys who have to be removed from their homes by tearing out a wall of the house? Hubby and I were doing a flip through the channels a few nights ago and he paused on one for awhile. They were doing the story of a woman who, I think, was 600+ pounds, and she was shown eating her way through a pizza while the story was being presented.

My first thought was, "I'm never eating again!"

Hubby said, "Gosh, that pizza is making me hungry!"

It was then that I recognized...again...that although we are both on a journey to change our lifestyles and eating habits, it is painfully obvious that our feelings about food and the whole overweight issue are entirely different.

He looks at the screen and does not relate to that woman or her misery...he just sees the pizza. He is not threatened by what he sees.

When I look at the same scene, I totally relate...I'm totally threatened...I'm totally afraid that I could be that woman if I let myself. I use food to comfort myself, to relieve boredom, to isolate myself from any pain I might feel. The only difference between her and me...in my mind...is the degree of the pain she must feel...and time.

My fear was and is that given enough time and enough denial of what I needed to do to change my awful eating habits, I could turn into that person I was seeing in that story.

For Hubby, there is little emotion involved with his eating. He sees food he likes and he eats until he is full. He doesn't care that a fresh-baked pie is sitting on the counter...if he is full...he is full and he stops eating. That same pie would haunt me by its mere presence. I would not be able to think of anything else.

So, we are completely different studies in our approach to weight loss and it is our challenge to always remember that when we are deciding what is "safe" to have in the house and how we feel about what comprises a satisfying meal. His approach is pragmatic...mine emotional.

ON A LIGHTER NOTE

I was going through some pictures yesterday and ran across this one and I had to share. You've listened to enough of my sermonizing about weight loss and I'm going to give you a break if you promise to stay on-program today!

This is my trusted companion, Kipper. He's normally so camera shy that I wouldn't have this picture if he hadn't been as sick as...well...a dog. It was taken the evening of Christmas Day, 2006. We had gone out to dinner and when we returned and opened the door, we were certain of one thing...something was wrong. The smell was horrible. The lights went on and there was such a mess of doggy something...we never could figure which end it came from...that we knew our dog was mighty sick and we had a very unpleasant evening ahead of us.

The cleaning was accomplished amidst a lot of gagging and I played nurse to poor Kipper. He was more than happy to be "tucked in" and have his head elevated on the pillow. Note the eyes and the little pink tongue hanging out.

Long story short...he recovered and so did the house...and we have a picture worth a thousand words. Looks like a guy who has partied a little too hard, huh?